For some time I have thought about starting a blog on my website, though I haven't been inspired to write, or perhaps I haven't had a reason to. There are two reasons for this blog post:

  1. To start my blog
  2. To unravel the scattered thoughts in my head and perhaps come to some clarity.

So I write to understand myself and the world around me, and perhaps find my direction. For some time now I have been battling the crippling chatter of the world around me in respect to my conceptual art. I have received criticism - good and bad - and it continues to be an issue for me. Not because I cannot handle criticism, but because it leaves me confused with what it is I am after.

I wish I could live off my art. That is any artist's dream. This world believes art is a luxury and not a necessity; I think otherwise. Art is at the very essence of the human spirit. Since pre-historic times, humans have depicted what they have seen as painted marks and carvings in caves. It is an innate human quality to want to leave our mark in the world. To have affected, touched, and inspired others through one's creative expression.

Which is why I am confused. I feel that if the art I am doing is so beautiful, conceptually and visually, then why is it not selling? Is it the medium? Is it the audience? What am I doing wrong? I have asked professors these questions and they have told me that an art practice does not equate to financial success. And sometimes people might get lucky and sell the art they make, and other times they don't. But the fact is that whether one sells their art or not, one should always be making it. 

I am not tied down to the art I am currently making. It is the art I am researching in this time in my life. I enjoy the Buddhist philosophy of making art in response to my senses because I can meditate through this process, I can be in the present moment. I also enjoy my work on wall, where I explore the textures of joint compound as well as the surface of the wall; these impermanent pieces talk about life's transitions and the beauty of appreciating art that cannot be "acquired." 

Perhaps I am making the right kind of art, since this art is a fundamental part of my spirituality. Perhaps it is those people who disagree with what they see that need to learn a little about my practice and why I make the marks I make and take the decisions I take. Perhaps they need to be exposed to the unknown so that they, too, can be informed of why I believe these Buddhist philosophies are so essential to being human. 

I think this was worth writing. I feel like I have some clarity. I have finally found some answers as to my direction. 

Until next time!